In The Company of True Beauty

Jordan’s bringing her tits onto the the show tonight so I’m feeling a bit humble. It might get a bit crowded on the sofa so we might have to get Judy to shove over a little or ask Jordan to let a little air out.

For those of you that don’t know who (or what) I’m taking about, we’ve posted this bio on our official website.

Katie Price is one of the most successful female celebrities in Britain today. She has conquered being a model, author, mum, wife and now perfumer! Katie is the author of four successful books, two of which are autobiographies. This month, Katie releases her new perfume ‘Stunning’. She joins Richard & Judy in the studio to talk about her new baby Princess Tiaamii and Pete’s struggle with Meningitis, her amazing success as an author, and her new perfume.

Hard to know where to begin, isn’t it? Makes my own accomplishments pale somewhat. To be honest, these big name interviews get me nervous. I've been back and to to the toilet all morning. The woman has talent oozing out of her every pore. I imagine this is how Parkinson felt before he interviewed Ali.

I should probably begin by chatting about little Princess Tia Maria and then asking her about becoming a role model for many young girls across the country. I’ll ask her about her boob jobs and how she got started in the business of soft core pornography. Of course, she’s a famous author with two novels out (ooh er!), so I’ll be asking her about the creative process that brought about her ‘amazing success’ and the moral choices she makes when faced with the job of writing page after page of sex. I'll ask her if she finds it as tedious to write as I find it tedious to read. Then I’ll ask her how she comes up with her ideas and how she first came up with now notorious scene in her first novel when her heroine ‘did it like a monkey’ in Knowsley Safari Park.

The woman is sure to interest you so don’t forget to tune in. And also, don’t forget to buy her new perfume, “Stunning” available from 24th August. Prices start from £18.00 but it’s cheaper if you buy it by the pint.

Some Jordan facts. Jordan has famously nicknamed her breasts Eric and Ernie, but did you know she's been sued by the estate of the late Ernie Wise? Did you also know that Jordan’s perfume actually contains her own nipple juice and comes with a money back guarantee should your nipples not grow an inch after using it? Jordan hopes to be shortlisted in this year’s Booker Prize and, if she is, she’ll be only the second author to do so with breast implants. Jordan is also involved in a high court action against the country of Jordan when it was announced that the small middle eastern nation intended to have a boob job and market its own perfume. Jordan’s calendars are always top sellers but did you know that for the past five years they’ve been missing the month of March?