My Letter To Cactus TV

Much to my horror, I've today realised that I haven't thanked the good people at Cactus TV for all the work they've put in over the last twelve months, making the show the success it is. I've hastily dispatched the following email to them, along with my official Christmas card.


Hi Guys!

Many years ago, a star shone brightly over Romford, East London, and a baby boy was born. That child grew up and, yay, how the people loved him! Well now that boy is a man and he wants to wish you all a very merry Christmas.

Speaking for all of us at ‘The Richard Madeley Appreciation Society’, I just wanted to say that ‘The Richard&Judy Show’ is a success because of the little people. And by little people, I don’t mean nanuses.* I mean you guys at Cactus TV. You are the people who put the shows together and it wouldn’t be the same without your input.

So, have a great holiday and a spirited New Year,

Hugs, squiggles, and kisses,

Dick

* I don’t mean to jump to any conclusions. If you do employ any people of diminutive size, then it’s quite clear that they also contribute to your much deserved success. Granted, they probably don’t do any heavy lifting work, like shifting scenery or moving the sofa, but I’m sure they do work that’s commensurable with their size and I would want to send them my suitably proportioned best wishes for the festive season.

The Official Richard Madeley Appreciation Society Christmas Card

With just a couple of weeks to go and since most of you will soon be going off with families and loved ones, I thought it best to send you my official Christmas card. Getting it early means that you still have time to use it as a desktop or have it printed on a t-shirt and worn to every Christmas party. And if you find yourself feeling lonely this Christmas (and let’s face it, who doesn’t?), you can always look at this picture and know that you have at least one friend in the world who won’t desert you.

Which is more than be said about Dr. Raj, the cheap brain hustling quack. Going away ‘to sunnier climes’ for Christmas. And just when we all need his help the most. The only trained trauma councillor I know and he’ll be thousands of miles away when the turkey hits the Fry. As for me, I’m stuck on blogging duties. I’ll still be here, working my fingers to the bone. Though, I know I shouldn’t, the alternative is ‘Christmas with Cilla’. And no, that’s the not the name of a TV special. I wish it were. At least I’d be able to leave the room. This Christmas we’re having everybody over. Des O’Connor, Esther Rantzen, Alan Titchmarsh... And, of course, Cilla. The only benefit of having Cilla Black in the house is that we have trained singer who frighten off any carol singers. Still, I’ll have Oddie and Fry here to keep me sane.

How did I get onto talking about this? Oh yes… The Christmas card. Well, here it is. Please do the sensible thing and spread it around. The more people see it, the more festive cheer we spread between us.