Richard: Clive, it’s lovely to have you here, it really is.
Clive: This is actually my home...
Richard: I know it is. Fantastic stuff. But first of all, can I just say that we loved your last book. Both Judy and I read it. Enjoyed it immensely. Great characters…
Clive: It was a book of essays.
Richard: Of course it was. That was the thing that Judy loved most about it. But I’m sure we’ll talk about that later. I wanted to start out by asking you about your career as a TV critic. For over ten years, or at least as far as I remember, you were possibly the most respected television critic in the UK. What do you now look back on and think of as your favourite show?
Clive: My favourite show? That’s a tough question. I suppose I have a certain affection to a little show called Endurance, or ‘Za Gaman’ as it’s know in Japan. The first time I saw it…
Richard: I was thinking more about programmes from the UK.
Clive: Oh, in the UK? That’s even harder. My own view, for what it’s worth, is that Alan Wicker made some of most significant…
Richard: A bit too old. More recent than that.
Clive: More recent?
Richard: Yes, I was thinking about TV at the moment. Is there any one show that you think really stands out from the crowd? I mean, it’s been a few years since many of us will have read your opinions on TV, so I thought it would be great if we could hear what you think about the kind of programmes that are being made now.
Clive: More recent TV? I would say that Spooks on BBC1…
Richard: Not on the BBC.
Clive: Well, of course, Coronation Street remains…
Richard: Not on ITV either. More in the region of Channel 4.
Clive: This new series of Britz…
Richard: Right channel, bit too adult. Something earlier in the day.
Clive: How much earlier in the day?
Richard: Oh, round about five o’clock in the evening, during late Autumn and winter. Perhaps a show that's currently enjoying a well earned break...
Clive: You’re talking about your show?
Richard: Not necessarily.
Clive: I think my favourite show on the TV, limiting my choices to Channel 4 before the watershed, but more specifically about five o’clock in the evening, during late Autumn and winter, would have to be The Richard&Judy Show.
Richard: Why do you like it so much?
Clive: I don’t particularly. In fact, I’ve never watched it.
Richard: Well there you go. Isn't that just indicative of so much? Why did you say you like it so much when you've not even watched it? Shouldn’t you, as one of the nation’s most loved critics, actually watch the programmes you’re judging? That’s what really gets on my nerves. People like you profess to have an opinion that the rest of the country should listen to, yet you haven’t got the integrity to watch the show you’re talking about. What do you say to that?
Clive: I think we should end this right here.
Richard: One last thing, you are big with the new media. Any websites you'd like to plug?
Clive: You know there are, Richard. I’ve done four series of my Talking in the Library programmes, which anybody can watch via my website at www.clivejames.com.
Richard: But you don’t blog?
Clive: I don’t have time to blog. I’m so busy with my projects such as…
Richard: Do you read blogs? What’s you favourite blog?
Clive: I don’t know. I’m a big fan of Stephen F…
Richard: I was thinking more along the lines of somebody you know…
Clive: I know Stephen Fr…
Richard: Closer to you, like… now. Somebody who might be in the room with you. Sitting next to you on your sofa.
Clive: I’m a huge fan of the Richard Madeley blog.
Richard: The Richard Madeley Appreciation Society.
Clive: Would you please leave?
Richard: Hey, couldn’t let you go without saying you’ve been a great guest. It’s always a pleasure listening to what you have to say. Been a big fan for years. Cheers.
Clive: I’ll have my wife call the police.
Richard: You must come back soon.
Richard: Last word.
Richard: Last word. I always have it...