Thursday 16 July 2009

Bless You All...

In my new role as Patron Saint of Squirrels, can I ask you, before you go to bed tonight, to bend a knee or two by the side of your cot, bow your head and say a few words on behalf of the poor grey squirrels?

Today has opened my eyes to the terrible persecution of these truly wonderful creatures. I've spent many hours watching a family of greys swing happily in their feeding hammocks. So, I ask you, if you've got some unwanted brassieres lying around the house, please stretch them between two trees and fill them with grain. Or perhaps you could hang a nut sack from a tree or scatter walnuts on your lawn. Trust me. I've been in the squirrel business for 24... no, nearly 26 hours now, and I've not heard a single thing that could go wrong. My plans are sound and so are my nuts.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

As patron saint of grey squirrels you may want to observe where they bury seeds and nuts for winter, and put out markers. Apparently when they need to dig them up for food they tend to forget where they've buried them.