It’s one of the unmentioned disadvantages of being a man that we can occasionally wound ourselves. I speak, of course, of striking oneself in an area that’s best left unstruck. How I managed to do this to myself, I’m really not sure but the feeling of sickness is only just passing. I was simply walking down the stairs and my right hand was swinging a little too freely at my side. It collided with the banister and rebounded into my crotch.
I’m only passing on this news in order to assure you that, as of 15:46, my luck has still not changed.