Hello fans of Uncle Dick and casual internet lurkers brought here looking for pictures of Clare Balding's nipples (yes, you know who you are Mr. BT Broadband from Chipping Norton)...
This is Stan Madeley still here, with Uncle Dick currently investigating reports of phantom moles in the area of his potting shed and refusing to blog until he's give his own show on Channel 4 (after the watershed).
However, on this chilly morning in November, it gives me chance to promote myself a little more and ask you to point your eyes in the direction of the 'Big Issue' where my latest diktat to the nation was to be found last week.
The piece was titled 'King for a Day' and outlined my plans for the nation should the constitution get a rewrite to include mention of a handsome chisel thrower from Luton. I encourage you to read it, especially if you're of a political bent and wish to understand this exciting new ideology from the man who made gourd swallowing a family friendly act.
Need I add that more of the same can be found in Second-Class Male, my book of misguided letters to famous strangers.
As Uncle Dick said to me this very morning:
'I hope that all my readers buy Second-Class Male, your book of misguided letters to famous strangers, Stan, but could you just grab Judy's legs and pull her out of the hole? I think she's shouting something about being attacked by moles.'
And with an endorsement like that, what kind of man wouldn't pull?