Monday, 1 December 2008

Twelve Things I Discovered Last Week

Perhaps it’s the lack of sunlight but I’m wallowing in a murky puddle of my own despondency. It could just be Monday morning and the lack of action in my inbox. Whatever it is, I have retreated to my room, leaving Judy in the back garden where she is using her leaf blower to put the frighteners on hibernating hedgehogs. For me, it’s a day to consider my options and to plan the week ahead. And I can think of no way of moving forward other than to look back on my past seven days. Here are the twelve important discoveries I made last week outside the field of particle physics.

Blog readers can cost me a fortune.
Recommendations for books left me out of pocket by a considerable sum. On Friday, I stumbled across a reasonably priced collection of Nicolas Bentley cartoons. I will be billing Nige accordingly.

Don’t Try To Be Witty About Disney

I managed to offend a close friend when I described the decor of the local Disney store as ‘resembling a paedophile’s bedroom’. Not a thing to say when she's purchasing gifts. Put a downer on the whole 'innocence at Christmas' theme she was aiming for.

Humour Is BIG At Christmas

All the book and DVD shops are now devoted to bad comedians and satirists making a fortune peddling their crap. What I want to know is why can’t other bad comedians and satirists can't make a shilling selling their rubbish

Apples Are Nice

In fact, typing on the keyboard on the new Apple MacBook Pro made me feel like I was playing with Brigit Bardot’s nipples (circa 1960). If Apple want to quote me on that, they can for the price of a new Apple Powerbook or Bridgit Bardot's nipples (circa 1960). The new notebooks are cut from a single piece of aluminium, which, by a remarkable coincidence, is the very same selling point as Bardot's nipples... Shame about the price, which puts both notebooks and nipples well outside the price range for this TV superstar.

Dell Laptops Are Small

And around £400, they are quite reasonably priced. Shame that they are also out of the price range for this TV superstar. I will continue to carry my large megalithic Sony with me, contributing to my bad knees and inability to write when in public. When I once dared open it in a Costa Coffee, I blocked out the light and drained the power from the frothing machine.

Fog Can Be Fun

Architecture never looks as when viewed on a clear November morning or when it’s thick with fog. Manchester’s Hilton Tower looked stunning in its grey overcoat on Friday.

I Like The New Yorker

Actually, I blew a gift voucher on the complete cartoons of ‘The New Yorker’. You know about my current obsession with the inky line, so I needn’t explain. The book doesn’t actually contain the complete cartoons but the price you pay is well worth it for the DVD-Rom, which includes over 79,000 cartoons in PDF format and fully searchable.

The Taxman Can Be Kind

Due to a long convoluted calculation that has to do with my earning very little (except my TV contracts, of course, which are in Judy’s name), I got a tax rebate last week. Hence my dreams of owning a new laptop and being able to afford to buy a couple of books.

I Miss Writing

I’ve not fully devoted myself to my writing for a few weeks and it’s time I tried to structure my week to get something finished.

My Feet Are Possibly A Little Bit Rank

Well, it's not my feet as much as my aging boots. Do you know the pair: black leather slip ons with the buckle on the side, currently held together with superglue and bits of leather cut from an old spectacles case? I love them. Best boots I've ever owned. However, I managed to clear a Clarks shoestore on Friday when I was a little too impulsive and I took them off to try on a replacement pair. As it happened, they didn't have my size in store. I bought a new tube of superglue instead.

Stephen Fry Is The Cause of Many Heart Attacks

When you get an email stating that ‘Stephen Fry is following you’, one can feel rather blessed. The fact that he’s tail-coating 21,000 other Twitterers is something that he should mention in the same email.


Barbara said...

I kept my Twitter email saying Stephen was following me. It may be an indication of how few thrills I get in my life but thrilling it was indeed.

Nige said...

Money well spent Dick - what was it called and where did you find it?

Dick Madeley said...

It's just a collection of his illustrations. It's simply titled 'Nicholas Bentley' in the 'Prion Cartoon Classics' (forward by Richard Ingrams). Oddly enough, I found it in the humour section of the local Waterstones. I've always avoided humour sections, which I've previously assumed only contained those books with horribly banal titles and very little wit. The Karl Pilkingtons of the world. Rather sad to find these books there.

With the Bentley and a collected Scarfe (which I've borrowed), I feel like I have the two extremes of cartooning before me. At the moment, though, I keep going back to Searle's St. Trinians.

Anonymous said...

情色電影, aio交友愛情館, 言情小說, 愛情小說, 色情A片, 情色論壇, 色情影片, 視訊聊天室, 免費視訊聊天, 免費視訊, 視訊美女, 視訊交友, ut聊天室, 視訊聊天, 免費視訊聊天室, a片下載, av片, A漫, av dvd, av成人網, 聊天室, 成人論壇, 本土自拍, 自拍, A片, 愛情公寓, 情色, 舊情人, 情色貼圖, 情色文學, 情色交友, 色情聊天室, 色情小說, 一葉情貼圖片區, 情色小說, 色情, 色情遊戲, 情色視訊, 情色電影, aio交友愛情館, 色情a片, 一夜情, 辣妹視訊, 視訊聊天室, 免費視訊聊天, 免費視訊, 視訊, 視訊美女, 美女視訊, 視訊交友, 視訊聊天, 免費視訊聊天室, 情人視訊網, 影音視訊聊天室, 視訊交友90739, 成人影片, 成人交友,

免費A片, 本土自拍, AV女優, 美女視訊, 情色交友, 免費AV, 色情網站, 辣妹視訊, 美女交友, 色情影片, 成人影片, 成人網站, A片,H漫, 18成人, 成人圖片, 成人漫畫, 情色網, 日本A片, 免費A片下載, 性愛, 成人交友, 嘟嘟成人網, 成人電影, 成人, 成人貼圖, 成人小說, 成人文章, 成人圖片區, 免費成人影片, 成人遊戲, 微風成人, 愛情公寓, 情色, 情色貼圖, 情色文學, 做愛, 色情聊天室, 色情小說, 一葉情貼圖片區, 情色小說, 色情, 寄情築園小遊戲, 色情遊戲, 情色視訊,

Anonymous said...

做愛的漫畫圖片, 情色電影分享區, 做愛ㄉ影片, 丁字褲美女寫真, 色美眉, 自拍俱樂部首頁, 日本偷自拍圖片, 色情做愛影片, 情色貼圖區, 八國聯軍情色網, 免費線上a片, 淫蕩女孩自拍, 美國a片, 都都成人站, 色情自拍, 本土自拍照片, 熊貓貼圖區, 色情影片, 5278影片網, 脫星寫真圖片, 粉喵聊天室, 金瓶梅18, sex888影片分享區, 1007視訊, 雙贏論壇, 爆爆爽a片免費看, 天堂私服論壇, 情色電影下載, 成人短片, 麗的線上情色小遊戲, 情色動畫免費下載, 日本女優, 小說論壇, 777成人區, showlive影音聊天網, 聊天室尋夢園, 義大利女星寫真集, 韓國a片, 熟女人妻援交, 0204成人, 性感內衣模特兒, 影片, 情色卡通, 85cc免費影城85cc, 本土自拍照片, 成人漫畫區, 18禁, 情人節阿性,

aaaa片, 免費聊天, 咆哮小老鼠影片分享區, 金瓶梅影片, av女優王國, 78論壇, 女同聊天室, 熟女貼圖, 1069壞朋友論壇gay, 淫蕩少女總部, 日本情色派, 平水相逢, 黑澀會美眉無名, 網路小說免費看, 999東洋成人, 免費視訊聊天, 情色電影分享區, 9k躺伯虎聊天室, 傑克論壇, 日本女星杉本彩寫真, 自拍電影免費下載, a片論壇, 情色短片試看, 素人自拍寫真, 免費成人影音, 彩虹自拍, 小魔女貼影片, 自拍裸體寫真, 禿頭俱樂部, 環球av影音城, 學生色情聊天室, 視訊美女, 辣妹情色圖, 性感卡通美女圖片, 影音, 情色照片 做愛, hilive tv , 忘年之交聊天室, 制服美女, 性感辣妹, ut 女同聊天室, 淫蕩自拍, 處女貼圖貼片區, 聊天ukiss tw, 亞亞成人館, 777成人, 秋瓷炫裸體寫真, 淫蕩天使貼圖, 十八禁成人影音, 禁地論壇, 洪爺淫蕩自拍, 秘書自拍圖片,